I wanted a destination wedding. We’re getting married near our home.
I wanted the wedding to be small, just a few of our closest friends. We’re inviting just over 100 people.
I wanted our ceremony to be secular. It won’t be.
I didn’t want to invite random family members just because “we’re supposed to”. We are.
I didn’t want to deal with my family’s drama. I am.
I wanted to spend less than $15,000. We’re not.
I burnt out on the wedding a few weeks ago. Since then I’ve been trying to recapture the feeling I had that first month, where everything seemed possible and I was so overwhelmed with joy I felt I could fly. I asked the boy if he, too, felt disappointed and frustrated by all the compromises we’ve made and he said, ‘I can be disappointed, or I can love the wedding we’re having. I’m going to to love the wedding we’re having.’
Right. So.
We’re getting married near our home, but that means our puppy gets to be with us.
The guest list is growing, but only because there are people who love us enough to want to give up their holiday and celebrate with us.
Our wedding won’t be secular, but it won’t be overtly religious either and it will be done by someone meaningful to me.
We are both inviting family we barely know to make our parents happy. Hopefully, they bring good gifts*.
My family will drive me crazy till the end of time. But dealing with them means my grandparents will be at our wedding.
We are spending more than we planned, but not more than we can.
It’s not what I planned, not what I originally wanted, but it’s the only wedding I’ll have.
You get what you need.
*Joking! Kinda.
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Aw. This is perfect. And I will check back again when I need the same reminder too.
I love this. This is so nice.
there is a point in a wedding when I think we realize that our loved ones want to see us do this, so the wedding becomes a little about them and what they want rather than what we want. I invited a few of my parents friends to make them happy, I had more people than I wanted at my wedding, it wasn’t perfect, but so many people came to celebrate the two of us marrying. and that in itself is so amazing. you are going to have a wonderful wedding despite any compromises that you have had to make. I promise.
This post is so true. I’m quickly learning that weddings are a compromise of massive proportion, but in the end, the most important thing is marrying the person you love and want to spend your life with. Your words put all of it into perspective.
I’m sure it’ll turn out even better than you planned! Hehe loving your gifts honesty.
Thanks for writing that! I’m going through the same frustration right now where I feel like the wedding is looking less and less like us and more blah. But yes, instead of crying my eyes red, its best to focus on the good parts and put energy into owning the parts that represent us and making sure those shine through.
girl, i am in the same boat as you are! frustration, stress, disappointment. but you know what, your boyfriend’s right..there are really great parts to getting married close to home, and you really put it all into perspective. it’ll be great.